isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Randomize
