He uses pillows to masturbate.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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