Moan for me like Helen Keller
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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