garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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