32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I need moral support for this bender
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
