He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
