we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize