David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
