Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
