sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize