I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
