Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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