I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
