mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
two words: eviction party
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize