after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
