due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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