Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize