no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
