oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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