that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
