a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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