I bet he comes in French.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
