At least make sure they are 18
Why
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
