Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
