i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
