Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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