That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
