don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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