He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
