I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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