He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
He passed out mid-signature
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
