They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Blood and glitter go together right?
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
