i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
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