i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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