I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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