Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
