Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize