we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize