I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
It's shark week go big or go home
I believe in your delicious
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
