But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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