Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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