Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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