stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
