The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
