check it out our google latitudes are spooning
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize