More tranny stories later!
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize