I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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