just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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