i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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