Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Randomize
