did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
