What tipped you off? The sombrero?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
