what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
